Sometimes we find ourselves trying to express what is going on inside and people just don’t seem to understand. The same metaphors and descriptors we use as a form of communication causes the meaning of our words to be taken lightly. At times I have found myself living in the prison of my thoughts and emotions. I felt like freedom’s key was in the pocket of someone else’s understanding of my expressions. However, I have come to realize that I hold the power of my words. I now know the liberty of my life is not based on someone else’s interpretation of how I feel. I spent so much time trying to obtain affirmation from those who claimed to love me and even those who didn’t care. My efforts to live beyond the existence gifted to me had to be redirected. I had to come to understand that the first person that needed to hear my voice was me. If I couldn’t hear me beyond the metaphors, creativity, and jokes then no one else would? Pressing past what was comfortable I finally heard what I was actually saying. Then, it didn’t matter if others understood it or not. The only thing stopping me from living in my truth was my reluctance to press my ear against my own mouth.
Maybe you feel like no one understands you. You may try to talk to friends, family, and even strangers. You are seeking someone who can hear your pain beyond the formatted framework of interpretation and expression. No one seems to get it, and that makes you frustrated. That feeling of loneliness is not about how many people are around you, but that no one can hear you screaming inside. Sometimes you may even be afraid. You may be afraid to hear your pain because the sorrow reflected in the rawness of your voice is alarming to your soul. However, listening to your struggle is essential to your healing. Removing the comfortable metaphors, heavy jokes, and the creative cloaking of your words is a necessity of progress.
I am not a singer, but I often sing my feelings or speak my thoughts into the Voice Memo app on my phone. When I listen to the recording, I feel comfort in hearing myself talk about what’s going on inside. There is a companion in the sound of my voice that somehow makes me feel like I am not alone. No, I am not crazy. I know that it is my voice I am listening to, but hearing it played back exactly the way I said it makes all the difference to me. There isn’t anyone who could understand me better.
Come out of your metaphor. Wash your words formerly dipped in sugar. Tell yourself how you really feel. Use whatever language you must. Whether you record it, write it, or simply say it out loud; don’t deprive yourself of the raw truth living inside you. Your freedom of expression is not for anyone else but you. Will you take a moment today to talk to yourself? Will you unburdened others from the expectation to understand you and leverage the voice within to empower yourself?
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