Photo by Darius Bashar on Unsplash
I can remember getting into trouble a lot as a child. I constantly challenged, not the authority, but the reasoning behind the instruction given to me by the adults in my life. I also got into trouble because of the pain that boiled into anger from the happenings of my childhood, but that’s a post for another time. I recall being in trouble pretty often and to be honest, there aren’t many times that I can say I didn’t deserve it. I would get whoopings, put in the corner on my knees, entertainment devices taken from me, refused tasty treats, and many other things as a result of something I had done. This is what is commonly known to me and many of you as “punishment.”
Now, I am a person who loves to define words; even words of which I have a pretty good grasp of the definition. Walk with me through a mini vocabulary lesson essential to the point of what I want to share with you today.
Let’s look at the definition of the word punishment: “suffering, pain, or loss that serves as retribution.”
Okay, let’s look at the definition of the word retribution: “something given or exacted in recompense.” (Bear with me; I am going somewhere with this…hold tight.)
Finally, let’s look at the definition of the word recompense: “to give something to by way of compensation; to pay for.”
So, if I breakdown the definition of punishment in my own words it becomes – suffering pain or loss to pay for something I have done.
Woah! That’s a heavy thing to endure in the growth and development of any child. Is that what the adults in my life wanted for me? Did they want payback for something that I had done by causing me to suffer? Honestly, I don’t know. I cannot speak to the motivations of their hearts, but I can speak to my perception of their actions. I processed these events as punishment.
Fast forward to my adult life I have come face to face with my internal processing of suffering to always be a punishment for something I have done. The tragedies that have happened in my life and my perception of why I suffer always cause me to create a formula that pulls an act from my past or present that resulted in the pain I feel in that moment. Now, don’t get me wrong, there are many times that this is true. I make decisions that aren’t beneficial and therefore, I suffer the consequences. However, that’s not the point here.
I was listening to a podcast this morning called: “Exploring My Strangle Bible” with host Tim Mackie. He mentioned a few times the phrase “severe mercy” as he talked about Jonah’s journey of running away from the will of God and then repenting and doing the will of God. I paused many times as I listened to this episode and asked myself: What is severe mercy? Why would he use the word “severe” to describe mercy?
Well, let’s define it. There are many definitions of the word “severe,” but the one I will pull is this: “requiring great effort.”
Okay, let’s define mercy: “lenient or compassionate treatment.”
Therefore, I define severe mercy as a strong effort to treat another with compassion and leniency. I don’t know about you, but this seems very different than my definition of punishment.
I have always thought of mercy as a delicate flower that has been cut from its bush. You have to care for it as much as possible to make it stay vibrant for as long as you can in the vase, but eventually, it wilts, and you throw it away. Now, I can quote scriptures that tell me about God’s mercy is everlasting, but apparently, I have never assumed this reality in my own life. That doesn’t make God’s truth any less real, but it made my relationship with God strenuous and distorted because I saw God’s opportunities to show me His severe mercy as punishment.
I am not one to play the “blame game” with God. Rarely do I find myself asking God why He did this or that to me. No, I almost immediately blame myself and find the reason for why God inflicted the suffering and wonder if my tender flower of mercy has any life left within it. This has caused God to be a ruthless tyrant in my heart waiting for me to mess up so that He has more reason to allow more pain in my life. This same God that I weep over, write poetry to, sing heart-wrenching songs of worship for; is the same God that I have attributed to my life’s “punishments.”
Hold on with me a little longer as I walk you through this …
The things that happen in our lives happen for a variety of reasons that I will not dare make an assumptive generalization for all of our situations. However, what I will say is: God is MERCIFUL. I have been introduced to God’s severe mercy through the story of Jonah and I realize I have not been punished all my life by God through suffering and pain, even those things caused by my own choices. No, all of the suffering and pain has produced the opportunity for God’s severe mercy because He loves me so much. You and I both know that it’s sometimes not until IT ALL BLOWS UP that we finally shift or move in the better direction. No matter what you feel, have learned in church, or experienced in your life; remember that GOD LOVES YOU. Remember that GOD WANTS TO BE IN RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. The suffering you are experiencing or have experienced, whatever the cause, is an essential time that The Father is excited to show up and show you how much He cares: severe mercy.
I reflect on my life and see God’s severe mercy through so many of my past troubles and have now come to realize, after being saved for 15 years, that if Jesus Christ paid the cost of my wrongs through His suffering on the cross (punishment) then The Father would not need me to pay for what has already been recompensed. I am learning each and every day to receive Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, not through praying “the sinner’s prayer,” but through seeing The Father as He truly is through His word.
Our child development plays a major part in our interactions with one another and how we live in relationship with The Father. Some of these foundational learnings are deeply damaging and it is by the power of the Holy Spirit that things are shifted so that we can live the abundant life that God intends for us. If you are in need of God’s severe mercy, I invite you to pray this prayer with me:
Father, you are a loving and compassionate God. I do not seek to take advantage of your love for me, but I do desire to live in the salvation that is produced by that love. I have done things in my past and have suffered pain at the hands of others. I take this moment to give you that history and let you reveal to me how your severe mercy showed up in those times. I also ask that you continue to show your mercy in my life as I do all I can to live according to your will for my life. When I fall, I ask that you engage with me in your severe mercy and help me to see it as it truly is, which is a reflection of your love for me and not a punishment. – In Jesus’ name, Amen.
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